The most memorable local eateries along the highways and back roads of America
Sign In | Register for Free!
Restaurants Recipes Forums EatingTours Merchandise FAQ Maps Insider

 Another Costco Story---

Author Message
mayor al

  • Total Posts: 15059
  • Joined: 8/20/2002
  • Location: Louisville area, Southern Indiana
  • Roadfood Insider
Another Costco Story--- Fri, 08/16/13 2:52 PM (permalink)
Constantly being broke and stuck in an unhappy marriage, a young husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large insurance policy on his wife, with himself as the beneficiary, and then arranging to have her killed.

A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a nefarious, dark-side underworld figure who went by the name of 'Artie.' Artie explained to the husband that his going price for snuffing out of a spouse was $10,000.

The husband said he was willing to pay that amount but that he wouldn't have any cash on hand until he could collect his wife's insurance money. Artie insisted on being paid at least something up front, so the man opened his wallet, displaying the single dollar coin that rested inside.

Artie sighed, rolled his eyes and reluctantly agreed to accept the dollar as down payment for the dirty deed.

A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local Costco Warehouse. There, he surprised her in the produce department and proceeded to strangle her with his gloved hands. As the poor unsuspecting woman drew her last breath and slumped to the floor, the manager of the produce department stumbled unexpectedly onto the murder scene. Unwilling to leave any living witnesses behind, ol' Artie had no choice but to strangle the produce manager as well.

However, unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were captured by the hidden security cameras and observed by the shop's security guard, who immediately called the police. Artie was caught and arrested before he could even leave the premises.

Under intense questioning at the police station, Artie revealed the whole sordid plan, including his unusual financial arrangements with the hapless husband who was also quickly arrested.
The next day in the newspaper, the headline declared.

(You're going to hate me for this...)



'ARTIE CHOKES 2 for $1.00 @ Costco
 
#1
    Scorereader

    • Total Posts: 5546
    • Joined: 8/4/2005
    • Location: Crofton, MD
    Re:Another Costco Story--- Fri, 08/16/13 3:22 PM (permalink)
    you're right...we hate you for that!
     
    #2
      Treetop Tom

      • Total Posts: 321
      • Joined: 7/20/2005
      • Location: Baltimore, MD
      Re:Another Costco Story--- Fri, 08/16/13 4:07 PM (permalink)
      mayor al: I always say there's nothing like a good joke.
      The rest of us: [sobbing] No, and that was nothing like a good joke.
      <message edited by Treetop Tom on Fri, 08/16/13 4:09 PM>
       
      #3
        ces1948

        • Total Posts: 1499
        • Joined: 8/6/2003
        • Location: Port St Lucie, Fl
        Re:Another Costco Story--- Fri, 08/16/13 4:26 PM (permalink)
        Like!
         
        #4
          MetroplexJim

          • Total Posts: 3704
          • Joined: 6/24/2007
          • Location: McKinney, TX
          Re:Another Costco Story--- Fri, 08/16/13 5:55 PM (permalink)
          Just curious ...
           
          Is a "Costco Story" a descendant of the "Shaggy Dog"
           
          #5
            ann peeples

            • Total Posts: 8317
            • Joined: 5/21/2006
            • Location: West Allis, Wisconsin
            Re:Another Costco Story--- Sat, 08/17/13 7:26 AM (permalink)
            Funny!
             
            #6
              Online Bookmarks Sharing: Share/Bookmark

              Jump to:

              Current active users

              There are 0 members and 1 guests.

              Icon Legend and Permission

              • New Messages
              • No New Messages
              • Hot Topic w/ New Messages
              • Hot Topic w/o New Messages
              • Locked w/ New Messages
              • Locked w/o New Messages
              • Read Message
              • Post New Thread
              • Reply to message
              • Post New Poll
              • Submit Vote
              • Post reward post
              • Delete my own posts
              • Delete my own threads
              • Rate post

              2000-2014 ASPPlayground.NET Forum Version 3.9
              What is Roadfood?  |   Privacy Policy  |   Contact Roadfood.com   Copyright 2011 - Roadfood.com