Hysterical Austin Foodie Reviews

I came across this "Cranky Yankee" review site, done by a transplanted Phillie resident. Basically it's funny, very coarse, review of Austin, Texas restaurants from an East Coast slant.

Absolutely hilarious, brutally honest, and worth the long read.

http://home.austin.rr.com/dangilman/food.html#Deli

Why do people dislike the East Coast? It should be self evident.
It's not very funny either. This strikes me as an unhappy anti-roadfooder who views everything through a Philly soft focus lens. I'm sorry, but regionalism is what we're all looking for.He needs to move back home.
I thought a little more about this...when I lived in Scottsdale/Phoenix, people came from other areas and lovingly recreated what they couldn't find in their new home. They didn't grouse about it, but opened an Iowa Cafe, or a KC bbq, or a Chicago pizza place. Maybe I'm getting old,(52 in about 5 hours, PDT) but listening to people bitch and moan doesn't interest me much anymore. Sorry.

Hm well I can see how the author's comments could rub people the wrong way. I tried to delete this thread but couldn't. If enough people complain maybe the administrators can delete the link, I'm really too new to this forum to realize what is frowned upon.

Alin001, Welcome to the forums! Don't delete! Once a thread starts, it takes on a life of it's own, with frequent and interesting turns. You just can't mention Clothier, OOPS! My view usually doesn't (thankfully, some would say) reflect the way others see the world. Look at it this way, It stirred enough passion in me to write that dissenting opinion. It's a success right there.Everything in life ends up being discussed here, through the filter of your roadfood friends. Lots of Texans and wannabe Texans on here. You can always introduce yourself on the new posters thread.

Thanks Bill! I guess I found it amusing because I'm a NY transplant to Austin myself. Sure, it's been over 25(!) years since I've been transplanted, and I was a mere lad while in NY, but the memories of East Coast delicacies (fried clams, black raspberry ice cream, true thin crust pizza) die hard.

The sunbelt's a strange and wonderful place, but for the transplants, it's not filled with a bunch of childhood memories. I imagine each place kind of takes on it's own motif. Who am I to condemn anyone? Just a suburban Kansas boy intruding on all these native Oregonians who swiped the land from the Indians 150 years ago. The only thing you don't want to be in Oregon is from California.They love me, cuz I'm from where their ancestors escaped from. Just a hundred years late.
Bill

quote:

Originally posted by bill voss

Why do people dislike the East Coast? ...when I lived in Scottsdale/Phoenix, people came from other areas and lovingly recreated what they couldn't find in their new home. They didn't grouse about it, but opened an Iowa Cafe, or a KC bbq, or a Chicago pizza place.

Well, I grew up in the East and I'll stand up for it. Haven't read the Austin critique so I'll leave that alone, but the East isn't by any means homogeneous. It's as diverse as any other part of the country and at least as interesting from a roadfood point of view (Maine lobster, New York delis and so much else, Chesapeake seafood, Carolina BBQ etc etc).

Still, your point about Phoenix is too, too true. I spend my winters near Tucson these days and most of the other folks around are Midwesterners. I wanted my home there to be as "Southwest" as possible and have decorated accordingly (Mexican tile floors, Navaho weavings and other native American stuff, rustic furniture and so on), but most of my neighbors' homes look inside (they don't have as much control over the outside) like something in Ohio. And their food tastes are the same--I always smile at the neighborhood Mexican place when everybody else is b_tching about the food being "too hot" while I'm dumping hot sauce on it. And I'd love a local Thai restaurant or something (there are some if I want to drive into Tucson) but I know it'd never fly--these folks are not food experimenters.

Too true BT! The first time I flew into Sky Harbor, with the shimmering heat off the runway, I was stoked! Going to see Robert Plant with my new found love; but where were the Adobes? what was going on? 115 degrees didn't help. Jeez, it was more midwestern than where I came from! Arizona's like a theme park where you can't get off the roller coaster. It just keeps going up and down SO fast.It took 4 years, but we made good on our escape back to a place where trees with leaves grow and the grass isn't PAINTED green.

quote:

Originally posted by bill voss

Too true BT! The first time I flew into Sky Harbor, with the shimmering heat off the runway, I was stoked! Going to see Robert Plant with my new found love; but where were the Adobes? what was going on? 115 degrees didn't help. Jeez, it was more midwestern than where I came from! Arizona's like a theme park where you can't get off the roller coaster. It just keeps going up and down SO fast.It took 4 years, but we made good on our escape back to a place where trees with leaves grow and the grass isn't PAINTED green.

Sorry to all for carrying on off-topic, but I gotta say that painted grass and lack of trees is one big reason I picked Tucson over Phoenix (the other bigger reason was I wanted a smaller less frenetic spot and Phoenix is now a BIG city--like LA). There is almost no grass in Tucson, God bless 'em (well, one of my neighbors has a plot about 6 x 20 ft to remind him of Michigan or something). Yards are gravel and it isn't painted. But there are trees--lots of Palo Verde and Mesquite in people's yards and very visible up in the mountains there are oaks and pines. People in Tucson do seem to try to keep the Arizona in Arizona, but when your sensibility was created in Illinois, you can't really help yourself. You don't quite get the "brown" thing (as opposed to green). Now I'll stand back for all the midwesterners hereabouts to screech and throw things.

Very sorry, but a bit of a rant from a native southwesterner here.

quote:

There is almost no grass in Tucson, God bless 'em (well, one of my neighbors has a plot about 6 x 20 ft to remind him of Michigan or something). Yards are gravel and it isn't painted. But there are trees--lots of Palo Verde and Mesquite in people's yards and very visible up in the mountains there are oaks and pines. People in Tucson do seem to try to keep the Arizona in Arizona, but when your sensibility was created in Illinois, you can't really help yourself. You don't quite get the "brown" thing (as opposed to green).

It's not that we don't LIKE grass, it's that we understand that, hello, it's a desert. There is not enough water for everyone to have a quarter-acre of Kentucky bluegrass. Gravel yards and xeriscaping are common by necessity (and in many cases, local laws), not some sort of laziness.

quote:

Still, your point about Phoenix is too, too true. I spend my winters near Tucson these days and most of the other folks around are Midwesterners. I wanted my home there to be as "Southwest" as possible and have decorated accordingly (Mexican tile floors, Navaho weavings and other native American stuff, rustic furniture and so on), but most of my neighbors' homes look inside (they don't have as much control over the outside) like something in Ohio.

Again, this is not meant as a personal insult, because I have no doubt that you're sincere in your respect for local cultures. But there's a strong respect for Native American culture instilled in many native southwesterners, including myself, that in part takes the form of NOT using "native American stuff" merely as decorative items. (And also by spelling Navajo correctly.) Among native New Mexicans -- and this includes white people such as myself, not just Indians and Latinos -- much hilarity is caused by recent arrivals to the area who adopt bits and pieces of the local cultures willy-nilly and in an ostentatious, superficial way.

Wanna make a New Mexican laugh so hard milk will shoot out of his nostrils, even if he's not drinking milk? Ask someone walking around covered in kokopellis just what a kokopelli is and why it's significant. Nine times out of ten, they won't be able to answer. It reminds me of that old urban legend about the woman proudly walking around in the sweater that says "Although inexpensive, this dish is very tasty," which has been reworked in New Mexico into an urban legend about people purchasing and proudly displaying items stamped with petroglyph-style pictograms that translate "White people will buy any old piece of crap."

Lucky, you may not have learned before you moved to MA that the white folks taught the Navajo to weave so that they might sell the result to other whites at white-owned trading posts to earn MONEY, but they did and I know the Native Americans who sold me my "stuff" were very glad I bought it. They didn't market these decorative objects to non-indians so we could use them other than to decorate.

As to kokopelli, I don't understand it and have never found it very attractive so I don't own anything decorated with it.

It's strange I've yet to find any native Arizonans-and this includes white people such as myself, not "just" Indians and Latinos-reluctant to allow me to buy the "bits and pieces of local culture" that they offer to me for sale in spite of the possibility that I may use them in an ostentatious, superficial way. But perhaps New Mexicans are different.

It never ceases to amaze me that people will go to a new place and be upset because it's not like where they came from. Austin is not Philadelphia and Philadelphia is not Austin despite the efforts of McDonald's and other megacorporations! This is especially true of the "ugly Americans" who go to other countries and do nothing but complain about everything because it's not like home. I had a wonderful opportunity to spend 3 months in the UK a few years ago and saw this first hand. It made me ashamed to be American. I only wished I had jumped all over, er, excuse me, politely corrrected, the idiots. There is no faster way to alienate people than to tell them "Well, where I'm from, we do it this way." Either relish in the difference or stay home.

Oh yes, I would like to thank Lucky Bishop for allowing us to live in his universe.

Although I will sing the praises of and 'knock' the negatives of SoCal life now that I am a dyed-in-the-wool Hoosier, I find it much more fun to go exploring in this MidWestern area for the subtle varieties of life that really are worth looking for.
I do wish we had a better selection of fruits and veggies in the off-season here that I used to find in the typical grocery in SoCal.
Does that balance for a light bill that is less than 1/3rd of what mine was 4 years ago in the desert? Nope
We choose to go where we go striking a balance of good and bad in each place, but sometimes apparently we forget that balance.
So Think about why you are where you are? And make the best of it.
Now pass me a cold one, and get on with the BBQ.

Did you guys actually read the reviews or just the disclaimer up front? The reviews themselves are not only pretty well written (especially for a student), they also give out decent ratings for a few standout performers. I did not care at all for the disclaimer, but then it was worded far stronger than the reviews which, by and large, rang true to me...

I'd be curious to hear Bushie's take on these...

pogophiles,
I read the whole thing, then went back and read it again. Yeah, they were well written. It just struck home with me from my time in the Valley of the Sun.
The difference between these reviews and say, Calvin Trillin, who approaches the different places & locales he goes with a sense that he's experiencing their world on their terms, is what I was venting about.
I'll still stand by the idea that Roadfood is about finding the hidden and well known specialities of a region, or see the results of a merging of ideas. Rating deli food & pizza in Austin in Philadelphia terms is too easy a target. That's why I didn't like the humor.

I keep reminding people here in San Diego, WE LIVE IN A DESERT. if we did not bring a whole river here from Northern California and have stolen most of the water from the Colorado River. This place would really be desolate! There are people who live here simply will not try different foods, some times I feel really alone. But I have several friend who also love to cook and love the Roadfood web site and we trade recipe's. Rex in warm, dry, expensive, San Diego.

I keep reminding people here in San Diego, WE LIVE IN A DESERT. If we did not bring a whole river here from Northern California and have stolen most of the water from the Colorado River. This place would really be desolate! There are people who live here simply will not try different foods, some times I feel really alone. But I have several friend who also love to cook and love the Roadfood web site and we trade recipe's. Rex in warm, dry, expensive, San Diego.

What is it in human nature that makes us (all?) want to make a new location look like the old one. As Rex points out folks move into a desert...then plant grass etc like they had in Indiana or wherever. From what I have read Phoenix and many other desert cities (Las Vegas? L A ?) have major water shortage projections, partially due to the over use of the water for landscaping and other 'frills'.
I guess I will do a dinner of dry beans and rice and beast roasted over an open scrap-wood fire to celebrate the progress of Mankind !

I did not find the negative too strong in the reviews. He gave credit where it was due and exposed the frauds for what they are, especially in the deli side of things. Life is to short for mediocre garbage food of which there is far too much. These villains shoud be taken to task.

Having read the article twice---i get the distinct feeling that i dont know any more about food in Austin then i did before i read it---i know i can give a list of the same thing here in Oklahoma or in California, or anywhere else for that matter ---there are ALWAYS LOTS of boring restaraunts everywhere--well maybe not in NOLA---but then i NEVER tried pizza in NOLA---WHY BOTHER!!!!---i willing to bet that if Bushie were to give a list of places in Austin that are worth eating NONE of those in this list would be there and i feel that this guy went out looking for food that fits into HIS idea of good food rather then AUSTIN,TEXAS's idea of good food---where is the mention of the wonderful Texas sausages that i here some much about?--or a good "bowl of red"? Having grown up in Massachusetts i learned this much---DONT ORDER FRIED CLAMS IN INDIANA!!!! GET THE TENDERLOIN! I know that when i was doing restaraunt reviews i realized that there lots of bad places to eat---just get of any interstate exit !! and lots of them are bad mom and pops---why bother to let me know about them--they are all to easy to find!!! I dont need to know about them. its the GOOD ones im looking for Thats why im here!

Lucky[

Again, this is not meant as a personal insult, because I have no doubt that you're sincere in your respect for local cultures. But there's a strong respect for Native American culture instilled in many native southwesterners, including myself, that in part takes the form of NOT using 'native American stuff' merely as decorative items. (And also by spelling Navajo correctly.) Among native New Mexicans -- and this includes white people such as myself, not just Indians and Latinos -- much hilarity is caused by recent arrivals to the area who adopt bits and pieces of the local cultures willy-nilly and in an ostentatious, superficial way.

Wanna make a New Mexican laugh so hard milk will shoot out of his nostrils, even if he's not drinking milk? Ask someone walking around covered in kokopellis just what a kokopelli is and why it's significant. Nine times out of ten, they won't be able to answer. It reminds me of that old urban legend about the woman proudly walking around in the sweater that says 'Although inexpensive, this dish is very tasty,' which has been reworked in New Mexico into an urban legend about people purchasing and proudly displaying items stamped with petroglyph-style pictograms that translate 'White people will buy any old piece of crap.'


Not to mention the fact that when people move to the desert and want it to be like home the ecosystem suffers. That little patch of lawn along with millions of others requires water, which adds humidity to the air. I'm afraid for the Southwest. I LIKE growing tomatoes so I live in SC-hot and humid, just the way they like it.

I read (partly skimmed) this whole article.

I have to disagree with those who think this guy is dissin' Austin. What he's has done is review the Northeastern foods he knows that are made in Austin. There were very few places he mentioned that are "true" Austin establishments, so I don't think he was out of line.

I have often stated that it's great to have some kind of semblance of regional foods available here, but it's not the same as eating the "real thing" at the source. When I moved to Austin in 1980, there was a real dearth of Italian, Chinese, Japanese, and other food. Over the years, Austin has become one of the most "international" cities in America in my opinion, and we can get some great things here.

Most all of the places he reviewed are attempts to emulate cafes from other regions. Nothing wrong with that, in fact, it's a good thing. (The only thing I think is, "coffee ain't really regional" )

Bottom line is that I enjoyed the reviews. He's honest and doesn't mince words, and I respect that. On the few places I've tried on his list, I have to agree with his assessment.

I had a feeling that would be your responce. I have no doubt that he his very right on in his reviews---i also thought that this was NOT Austins best. I hope he finds more places he likes!

quote:

Originally posted by tiki

I had a feeling that would be your responce. I have no doubt that he his very right on in his reviews---i also thought that this was NOT Austins best. I hope he finds more places he likes!

Yeah, tiki, I think you and I would be hangin' out at some different places.

Thanks Bushie -- glad to see that my "gut" instincts aren't too far off...