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 Merry Christmas to everyone! (I'm not gone)

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  • Total Posts: 7593
  • Joined: 4/17/2005
  • Location: Marina del Rey, CA
Merry Christmas to everyone! (I'm not gone) Sun, 12/22/13 12:57 PM (permalink)
I want to wish all of you a Merry Christmas and most important a Happy, Healthy New Year.
Three weeks after my Mom passed away (on a Thursday) my sister-in-law told me my brother had the flu.  I called him every hour to see how he was and he sounded awful.  She (SIL) was never there when I called!
I need to take care of my baby brother because he's all I have. 
Friday I continued with my calls and he wasn't any better.  This had been going on since Wednesday evening.  I asked what his temperature was and he could barely tell me that he didn't have any. 
I kept calling and he wasn't getting better.  He couldn't move his head or walk.  When I finally caught my SIL at home I asked abut his temperature.  No, he didn't have any.  I said that it didn't sound like the flu and in her "I know more than anyone" attitude she said that you don't have to have fever with the flu.
I continued my hourly calls and he continued getting worse instead of better. 
Friday night I told Sharon that if he has the flu, I'm going to catch it because I'm going over there in the morning... Saturday.
I did.  SIL left as soon as I got there.  I sat with him and he could hardly roll over in the bed.  I tried to get him to drink something because it was day 4 of him being like that.  He couldn't.
I asked if he'd taken his blood pressure.  No.  SIL came home and found the Blood pressure machine for me.  186/111   Howard said... it's time to go to the hospital.  I'd been telling him for 2 days that he needed to do that.
The 2 of us got Howard out of bed and there was no way he could stay on his feet.  He felt right over.  I had stopped at Mom's to get her walker before going there and with the walker and the 2 of us we managed to get him to the car and the emergency room.
Howard had a stroke from 3 things... a brain anerism, an AVM and the clot from the leaking blood.
I've been at the hospital every day for 2 weeks and half way through the night for 2 weeks.
Three days ago he had brain surgery to remove the problem and he's going to be fine... says the surgeon.  He's going to need therapy for his walking but knowing my brother he'll be walking better than he ever has because in May he's going to walk my niece down the aisle.
Please...  get yourself blood pressure machines and if you're sick, don't wait to get better if it doesn't feel right.  Get yourself to the hospital to rule out problems.
My brother thinks I saved his life.  No, the surgeon and any powers that be did that.
Please..  everyone.  Stay healthy and don't ignore warnings.
Every day is precious and you are all precious to me.
Sorry for being sappy but I've had the worst 6 weeks of my life and I'm not ready for any more of this.
I've missed you all and hopefully I'll be back full steam in a few days.
We've been eating Cedars Sinai food for 2 weeks now and really, it's not that bad.  I'd just rather not be there and eat elsewhere... even McDonalds!
    Michael Hoffman

    • Total Posts: 17805
    • Joined: 7/1/2000
    • Location: Gahanna, OH
    Re:Merry Christmas to everyone! (I'm not gone) Sun, 12/22/13 1:00 PM (permalink)
    I'm glad to hear your brother is doing well and is going to be fine. You take care of yourself.

      • Total Posts: 4712
      • Joined: 11/5/2004
      • Location: Stoughton, WI
      Re:Merry Christmas to everyone! (I'm not gone) Sun, 12/22/13 1:12 PM (permalink)
      Kudos to you for stepping in, Mar.  You definitely get some credit for making sure Howard's still here.

        Re:Merry Christmas to everyone! (I'm not gone) Sun, 12/22/13 1:24 PM (permalink)
        Mar:  you are the boss and you did well.  Your SIL is the goat here and he should have been in the hospital several days before you took command.  My dad had a stroke and passed away at 69.  I have been in blood pressure medication for years and my BP is normal.  I am glad your brother is doing fine.
        Paul E. Smith
        Knoxville, TN

          • Total Posts: 1269
          • Joined: 8/10/2008
          • Location: SFBay Area, CA
          Re:Merry Christmas to everyone! (I'm not gone) Sun, 12/22/13 3:09 PM (permalink)
          Wow--you've definitely had a rough six weeks.  I'm so sorry, but glad to hear your brother is recovering and will be okay. 
          It's okay to noodge your friends a little about health issues.  Some of us can use reminders from time to time.
          Merry Christmas, Mar, and I hope the New Year will be a good one for you. 

            • Total Posts: 2230
            • Joined: 3/16/2011
            • Location: Kennewick, WA
            Re:Merry Christmas to everyone! (I'm not gone) Sun, 12/22/13 7:06 PM (permalink)
            Mar, glad to see your Brother is going to recover and be fine. Lets get the heck out of this year, it hasn't been real nice to you.........All of us here wish you and Sharon a Merry Christmas and a happy New Year...........Bill, Joyce and Mollie

              • Total Posts: 3551
              • Joined: 5/9/2003
              • Location: Mission Viejo, CA
              Re:Merry Christmas to everyone! (I'm not gone) Sun, 12/22/13 9:26 PM (permalink)
              All the best for your brother's recovery, Mar. And you take care of yourself too!

                • Total Posts: 1787
                • Joined: 3/23/2008
                • Location: Minot, ND
                Re:Merry Christmas to everyone! (I'm not gone) Mon, 12/23/13 7:12 AM (permalink)
                Mar, you've had a rough last few weeks!  You make sure you take care of yourself as well.  Cheers

                  • Total Posts: 3704
                  • Joined: 6/24/2007
                  • Location: McKinney, TX
                  Re:Merry Christmas to everyone! (I'm not gone) Mon, 12/23/13 7:22 AM (permalink)
                  We wish & pray you a Blessed Christmas and a positive, productive, happy & healthy New Year.
                  Jim & Wafa

                    • Total Posts: 7593
                    • Joined: 4/17/2005
                    • Location: Marina del Rey, CA
                    Re:Merry Christmas to everyone! (I'm not gone) Mon, 12/23/13 12:57 PM (permalink)
                    Thank you, everyone. 
                    Howard may go home tomorrow.  His prognosis is very good.
                    I'm holding up which to me is amazing.  Between Mom and Howard I did a lot of crying when we were told what Howard's problem was.  Making sure he was okay took over and got me through it.  I had to be strong.
                    I'm a wreck but I'm getting better as Howard gets better. 
                    Here's to 2014!

                      • Total Posts: 1084
                      • Joined: 3/29/2003
                      • Location: Edgewater Park, NJ
                      Re:Merry Christmas to everyone! (I'm not gone) Mon, 12/23/13 2:14 PM (permalink)
                      Oh, Mar, I am so sorry that you -- and Howard -- had to go through this. I can relate to the sister-in-law thing, as mine didn't "notice" that my brother Fred had lost 100 lbs. after his retirement, and not on purpose. Long story short, he has Stage 4 colorectal cancer and I blame her for not putting him in the hospital or at least to the doctor when this first started happening and he had no appetite. There's no communication anymore between me and this part of the family. I probably won't even get a call until the end. And there will be an end, I'm sorry to say. I've been on a rollercoaster of emotions for two years.  I should actually be messaging you all of this on Facebook, but I've been so busy since November 1 when I moved...
                      All men -- get a screening when you're 50!! GET IT!!

                        • Total Posts: 6317
                        • Joined: 7/6/2006
                        • Location: Live at Saint Clair
                        • Roadfood Insider
                        Re:Merry Christmas to everyone! (I'm not gone) Mon, 12/23/13 7:00 PM (permalink)
                        Mar -
                        I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers, for the coming new year.  You have been through a lot, know that your friends are always here for you.
                        ps:  http://www.gratefulness.o...l=eng&cid=19959305
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