Redtressed is in the Hospital

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Bushie
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/19 21:14:38 (permalink)
quote:
Originally posted by redtressed


9. Dieticians and nutritionists have no soul or no clue.

Amen to that. You learned well, Grasshopper. (A clinical dietician once told me that I shouldn't eat Salmon because it had lots of fat.)

And, I think I'm going to start shaving my legs, too, just to be safe...
ocdreamr
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/19 21:20:18 (permalink)
Welcome back to the sandbox Redtressed! Your adventures had me splitting my sides with laughter. I have always believed that laughter is the best medicine.
jvsmom
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/19 21:29:20 (permalink)
Welcome back Red. And I loved the post about the hospital experience. I'm sure it wasn't so funny when it was happenning, but your recap was a riot. Thanks for sharing, and hoping that was the last multi-day vacation at a hospital you'll have for a long time.
fcbaldwin
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/19 21:37:58 (permalink)

Well I don't know about y'all, but I'm not taking any chances...




Red, I'm sorry you had to endure what you described; but I'm sure that Adam and all other of your loved ones (us included) are thankful to have you home.

Frank
Art Deco
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/19 22:06:29 (permalink)
quote:
Originally posted by Bushie
And, I think I'm going to start shaving my legs, too, just to be safe...


Legs heck, I'm shaving my a**!
Bushie
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/19 22:13:10 (permalink)
quote:
Originally posted by pogophiles


Legs heck, I'm shaving my a**!

Good idea. Never can be TOO safe...
lamertz
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/19 23:55:13 (permalink)
Red,you are too funny!!! I'm sure your sense of humor is what helped you through this week. Glad you're home. Please take good care of yourself. You had me a little scared. I don't think I'll forget to shave.
tiki
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/20 01:53:39 (permalink)
Just glad to have you back,Red---but i am NOT shaving my legs---i did that once and it all grew back twice as thick!!!---oh and they are ALL bigger then we thought---thats why God put them on the back where we wouldnt notice it so often!
lleechef
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/20 04:31:05 (permalink)
Red, glad you survived the Mack truck. Shave your legs regularly, stay off of the Hallmark Channel, forget about the Chinese Finger Torture, the un-Roadfood cardboard food they served ya and above all, AVOID THE BALANCE BEAM!!!!
Donna Douglass
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/20 07:59:42 (permalink)
Janeen, your posts are every bit as much fun to read as any of Erma Bombeck's columns, and we all know she was a hoot. What a wonderful talent and sense of humor you have. And that sense of humor will see you through to a full and successful recovery.

Now don't ever scare us like that again!!!!

Donna
varelas
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/20 09:05:17 (permalink)
Janeen, my advice to you is wax don't shave. A wax job will last for
6-7 weeks.It hurts like #&*% [|)][|)]the first few times but after that it's not so bad.

On the serious side Jenee, welcome home and take care so you never have to be naked before so many without getting paid.
Rick F.
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/20 09:19:36 (permalink)
I saw this at the top of the forum list and came straight to the last page to see what was cooking. I'm gonna have to back up and read! I knew Red was in hospital, but it sounds as if I missed a day at the circus!
Lexi
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/20 10:59:09 (permalink)
Red:

Having survived 4 open-heart surgeries (congenital crap and I am only 43) I applaud your narrative and say Amen to all that. I just counted on my fingers (and toes) and I think I have had 6 or more cardiac caths, umpteen echos, and a Trans-esophogeal echo that I still have nightmares about. The food sucks, but the drugs are stellar! The urinary cathetar is so convenient! And I still have huge issues with apple juice. I am lucky, like you, to be able to laugh about it but having to pay attention to your health is something that takes getting used to.

OK Superwoman - your cape awaits and I'll be flying right there next to you. Don't give up on the chicken skin, either. Better to eat a little fat than to live a little longer in a dry, tasteless world.

with love,

Lexi
Ort. Carlton.
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/20 18:44:02 (permalink)
Redtressed,
Your wonderfully witty post regards your hospital stay almost made laugh out loud - but I didn't, because I AM in the library.
You just keep yourself well. Keep us posted on your howabouts. Hey, I went through a similar same thing some time ago, and it WAS gastro-intestinal in nature!
Here's another good hug (((((*))))) for you. Share it with your son. You ARE loved, Janeen, and don't you forget it!
More later.
Toastingly, Ort.
P. S. Shall I shave my legs in empathy?
P. P. S. I would write more, but the library is clo
harriet1954
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/20 20:26:55 (permalink)
[img]http://www.news.cornell.edu/Chronicle/99/9.16.99/Funt-mug.GIF[/img"THAT'S what her butt looks like?? O-kaaaay..."

zataar
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/20 21:09:34 (permalink)
Redtressed, You should consider a career as an essayist. Your account of your experience is worthy of publication! We're all glad you're home. Hope you're doing fine. Zataar.
chezkatie
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2004/11/28 20:52:23 (permalink)
Have been away for over 2 weeks so just reading about you and your hospital stay. I am so happy that you are back in action and glad to see that you are still filled with good humor. Life deals all of us many blows but the ability to deal with them makes us much stronger and finer human beings. God bless you and your handsome son.

PS now off to shave my legs!
Michael Hoffman
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2005/01/09 22:03:21 (permalink)
OK. I just spoke with Redtressed's ex-husband at the hospital in Morgantown. He tells me that she's being tested right now to determine whether she might have a dislocated hip.
UncleVic
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2005/01/09 23:21:47 (permalink)
quote:
Originally posted by Michael Hoffman

OK. I just spoke with Redtressed's ex-husband at the hospital in Morgantown. He tells me that she's being tested right now to determine whether she might have a dislocated hip.


I think she just loves that Hospital Food... Keeps going back for more..

Hurry back Red...
Michael Hoffman
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2005/01/09 23:41:02 (permalink)
OK. Redtressed is home. It was just a hip problem. It wasn't her heart. She said she's OK, and using a cane.
redtressed
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2005/01/10 00:01:05 (permalink)
lolol........I HATE HOSPITAL FOOD

I just have a simple hairline fracture....very tiny, caused by bumping some FREAKIN" significant arthritis I wasn't aware I had. All will be well except I'm now ruining my girlish image by using a FREAKIN' cane for awhile.And yes my legs were shaven and smooth this time and Dr Chuck Whiteman was a much happier camper. Thanks y'all........
Rick F.
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2005/01/10 01:38:11 (permalink)
quote:
Originally posted by Jennifer_4

I've sent up prayers for her speedy recovery.
Ditto!
zussers
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2005/01/10 05:55:53 (permalink)
Red,

Ouch! I bet that cane can be put to better use if anyone gets in the way! Wack! Have a speedy recovery and am glad you are back at home and on this site where you belong!

Susan
chezkatie
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2005/01/10 07:44:23 (permalink)
quote:
Originally posted by zussers

Red,

Ouch! I bet that cane can be put to better use if anyone gets in the way! Wack! Have a speedy recovery and am glad you are back at home and on this site where you belong!

Susan


The guys are all in trouble now.............she has both a cane AND a paddle! I had the same thing happen to me in July......no more cane...just limping along
mayor al
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2005/01/10 07:59:25 (permalink)
Glad you're back, Red. I removed the red lights and siren sounds from the first page of this thread...Stay safe !
fcbaldwin
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2005/01/10 08:53:16 (permalink)




Welcome Home Redtressed!

ocdreamr
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2005/01/10 09:40:39 (permalink)
Morgantown , WV (AP): In a bold, not so surprising move on Christmas Day, a local middle aged mother was taken captive by an elite intergalactic Delta Force of Power Rangers, Mutant Ninja Turtles, Zoids, Transformers, Farmer Militia men, GI Joe's and dinosaurs. She is being held in the bowels of the Power Rangers Ninja Academy, awaiting trial for pre-war crimes such as not telling Santa that a Shrek Chia Pet was requested by the High Lord Commander, as well as depriving the HLC of a constant diet of cookies, candy and ice cream. The Academy is surrounded by a phalanx of John Deere tractors, remote controlled speed vehicles, Tonka trucks, and a CAT bulldozer that constantly plays skin crawling sounds and music. Three pissed off kitties and a fat old mutt dog, suffering from lack of sleep also guard the beleaguered
prisoner. A 5 minute interview with the victim revealed she had been subject to the inhumane tortures including being forced to walk barefoot over spiked dinosaurs, sharp edged plastic ammunition, hard rubber snakes and pieces of land mined taffy, as well as being enslaved to cater to every bellow of the HLC's demand for "MORE HOT CHOCOLATE AND TEN MARSHMALLOWS, YOU INFIDEL!" The exhausted, hallucinatory and half crazed mama had one request of the public:


"DEAR GOD.......someone notify AMNESTY INTERNATIONAL puuuuuhhhhhllllleeeeeeeeazeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!"
" />

And all you got was a little cracked hip!! I'd say you were pretty lucky to get out alive!!
ConeyIslandLou
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2005/01/10 09:48:30 (permalink)
quote:
Originally posted by redtressed

lolol........I HATE HOSPITAL FOOD

I just have a simple hairline fracture....very tiny, caused by bumping some FREAKIN" significant arthritis I wasn't aware I had. All will be well except I'm now ruining my girlish image by using a FREAKIN' cane for awhile.And yes my legs were shaven and smooth this time and Dr Chuck Whiteman was a much happier camper. Thanks y'all........



WHEW!!![
meowzart
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2005/01/10 10:02:01 (permalink)
quote:
Originally posted by ocdreamr

Morgantown , WV (AP): In a bold, not so surprising move on Christmas Day, a local middle aged mother was taken captive by an elite intergalactic Delta Force of Power Rangers, Mutant Ninja Turtles, Zoids, Transformers, Farmer Militia men, GI Joe's and dinosaurs. She is being held in the bowels of the Power Rangers Ninja Academy, awaiting trial for pre-war crimes such as not telling Santa that a Shrek Chia Pet was requested by the High Lord Commander, as well as depriving the HLC of a constant diet of cookies, candy and ice cream. The Academy is surrounded by a phalanx of John Deere tractors, remote controlled speed vehicles, Tonka trucks, and a CAT bulldozer that constantly plays skin crawling sounds and music. Three pissed off kitties and a fat old mutt dog, suffering from lack of sleep also guard the beleaguered
prisoner. A 5 minute interview with the victim revealed she had been subject to the inhumane tortures including being forced to walk barefoot over spiked dinosaurs, sharp edged plastic ammunition, hard rubber snakes and pieces of land mined taffy, as well as being enslaved to cater to every bellow of the HLC's demand for "MORE HOT CHOCOLATE AND TEN MARSHMALLOWS, YOU INFIDEL!" The exhausted, hallucinatory and half crazed mama had one request of the public:


"DEAR GOD.......someone notify AMNESTY INTERNATIONAL puuuuuhhhhhllllleeeeeeeeazeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!"
" />

And all you got was a little cracked hip!! I'd say you were pretty lucky to get out alive!!


You said it OC!!!!!!
Michael Hoffman
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RE: Redtressed is in the Hospital 2005/01/10 10:13:17 (permalink)
So, Red, do you think I ought to cancel that stateroom on the QM?
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