We're meeting my son's birthmom

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mr chips
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2011/11/05 01:31:41 (permalink)

We're meeting my son's birthmom

After 18 years, my son Sam is meeting his birth mom(and possibly his birth father). Trudy, Sam and i will be traveling to southern California next week to meet everyone. It turns out his birth mother and father married and there will also be a younger brother and sister to meet as well. There is a wild mix of emotions and we will be playing a lot by ear. We are also hoping to meet a couple roadfooders for some meals but obviously this will be Sam's trip.
post edited by mr chips - 2011/11/27 02:41:35
#1

19 Replies Related Threads

    Foodbme
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/11/05 02:59:17 (permalink)
    Am I assuming correctly that Sam is your adopted son?
    #2
    ann peeples
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/11/05 08:31:01 (permalink)
    Mr chips, that is truly going to be an unforgetable event for your family! I have no doubt that your thoughts are all over the map, and I wish Sam, you and Trudy a successful trip.
    #3
    flyseye
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/11/05 09:29:37 (permalink)
    Best of luck to all of you Chips. I really hope everything works out fantastic. Have a safe trip,and enjoy SoCal.
    #4
    wheregreggeats.com
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/11/05 10:12:27 (permalink)
    Best wishes.  Knowing you (and Sam) personally, I know that this will just be another mile on a tremendous road ... for all of you.
     
    #5
    wheregreggeats.com
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/11/05 10:14:07 (permalink)
    Foodbme

    Am I assuming correctly that Sam is your adopted son?

    I think I can jump in and answer that one.  You can assume you are correct.
    #6
    mar52
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/11/05 12:21:46 (permalink)
    Very exciting and I hope everything goes just as planned.
     
    It's raining here.
    #7
    stricken_detective
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/11/05 17:13:40 (permalink)
    How fun! Have a great time.
    #8
    CajunKing
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/11/07 17:12:04 (permalink)
    Mr Chips, Trudy & Master Sam,
     
    I will keep you all in my thoughts and prayers.  I know it will be a roller coaster of emotion, I am hoping you have a great visit and introductions, and some great roadfood too.
     
    CajunKing
    Donald
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    mayor al
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/11/08 18:27:08 (permalink)
    Jim,
      I wish you and your family well as you explore a very emotional experience for all involved.  Our oldest son is adopted. In his early 30's he was contacted by his birth family (a sister). As Cajun King says, the result of that contact has been a roller-coaster of experiences both good and some very painful ones for him, and to a lesser degree for us (his parents). He was 2 years old when he was placed with us for adoption, so his knowledge of his birth history was limited to the information provided to the agency by his birth mother. The real story that he uncovered thru the contact with that family was considerably different from that of the news we had shared with him thruout his childhood. This caused some real painful times as he found out "The Truth".  While he does maintain contact with the original sister who searched him out, he does not seem to feel any change in the family ties that he grew up with.
       Overall I would say the experience was worthwhile, to clear the air about "who he was", but it was a difficult time for us for a while.
      Best wishes for a successful encounter.
    #10
    buffetbuster
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/11/09 08:16:19 (permalink)
    mrchips-
    Best of luck to you, Trudy and especially Sam.  Can't possibly imagine how he must be feeling.  We are looking forward to hearing all about it when we see you in Portland in a few weeks.
    #11
    mr chips
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/11/26 02:30:25 (permalink)
    The Chips family took a trip to southern California over veteran's day weekend to meet son Sam's birth mother. It turns out that Sam's birth parents got married 5 years after his birth sot we ended up meeting  his birth father and Sam's brother and sister as well.
       It was emotional but it went well for all. Sam was delighted to meet his sister and his birth parents were delighted to meet him. Sam went to Knott's Berry farm with his birth family one day, went to Universal Studios and Universal City walk with Trudy and birth family another, I went to a bowling alley, video game and pizza emporium where we watched the Oregon-Stanford game. Sam's birth mom thanked us for the visit, getting to meet his birth father was both emotional and a chance to correct misimpressions of 18 years ago and it was great to meet his brother and sister. Sam will be returning for a visit over xmas vacation.
        It is difficult to explain all the emotions. I'm glad Sam will be able to add to his family. They seem to be very good people. There is always a little trepidation about these events but I feel the visit went pretty well and have no fear about Sam's visit next month.
     
     
    post edited by mr chips - 2011/11/26 16:25:16
    #12
    carlton pierre
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/11/26 06:52:26 (permalink)
    mr chips

    After 18 years, my son Sam is meeting his birth mom(and possibly his birth father). Trudy, Sam and i will be traveling to southern california next week to meeyt everyone. it turns out his birth mother and father married and there will also be a younger brother and sister to meet as well. There is a wild mix of emotions and we will be playing a lot by ear. We are also hoping to meet a couple roadfooders for a couple meals but obviously this will be Sam's trip.

    You are brave in doing this.  If anyone can pull this off in a good way it's you, Chips.  Good luck and best wishes.
    #13
    mayor al
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/11/26 12:49:59 (permalink)
    Jim,
      We hope all went well with the meeting. Give us a status report when you can, Please.
    AL
    #14
    mar52
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/11/26 13:48:54 (permalink)
    I'm so glad to hear that all went well!
     
     
    #15
    mr chips
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/11/26 16:33:14 (permalink)
    mayor al

    Jim,
    I wish you and your family well as you explore a very emotional experience for all involved.  Our oldest son is adopted. In his early 30's he was contacted by his birth family (a sister). As Cajun King says, the result of that contact has been a roller-coaster of experiences both good and some very painful ones for him, and to a lesser degree for us (his parents). He was 2 years old when he was placed with us for adoption, so his knowledge of his birth history was limited to the information provided to the agency by his birth mother. The real story that he uncovered thru the contact with that family was considerably different from that of the news we had shared with him thruout his childhood. This caused some real painful times as he found out "The Truth".  While he does maintain contact with the original sister who searched him out, he does not seem to feel any change in the family ties that he grew up with.
      Overall I would say the experience was worthwhile, to clear the air about "who he was", but it was a difficult time for us for a while.
    Best wishes for a successful encounter.
    Actually we were fortunate to have reasonably accurate information about the situation so  there were no discoveries of an awful nature. all of the discoveries have been positive and/or interesting.  The honeymoon will be difficult to extend over xmas for all but i think it will be interesting for sam to meet his extended birth family and he seems very anxious to do so.

    #16
    mayor al
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/11/27 12:10:45 (permalink)
    Congratulations on a very important event in your (and Sam's) life. I do hope all continues to be a positive experience for all of you.
    #17
    mr chips
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2011/12/14 21:45:14 (permalink)
    Sam will be visiting his birth family over xmas vacation. he will be returning the day of the Rose bowl so he should be able to watch the Ducks and the Badgers.
    #18
    mr chips
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2012/01/07 00:29:42 (permalink)
    Sam met six uncles over his holiday vacation, numerous cousins and his birth grandparents on his father's side. He seemed to have a good time and really enjoyed his trip.
     
    #19
    felix4067
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    Re:We're meeting my son's birthmom 2012/01/07 02:19:18 (permalink)
    I am so glad it's working out well! It sounds like your Sam came from a good family, just one that couldn't provide for him when he entered their world. Kudos to all of you (and I include his birth family) for handling what could have been a very awkward situation with grace, finesse, and understanding.
     
    Our fear with my niece's adopted kids is the day they meet their birth family again. We're hoping they don't want to for a very, very long time. But then our kids came from a less than stellar family to say the least (they were taken away as opposed to given up).
     
    Anyway, thank you so much for sharing, and keeping us updated!
    #20
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