Revelations reveals to us:
"The Earth was covered by a great scourge. An insidious plethora of pre-fabricated and poorly prepared nourishment and sustenance. The Lord was dismayed at this development and it's acceptance by the masses.
It came to pass, that out of the chilly northeast, a couple who were known as Jane and Michael Stern, were themselves saddened by this plague upon the land. As they set out upon the road in search of more worthy preparations of the Lord's bounties, the Lord spoke to them from the starry heavens. "Jane, Michael, you of great wisdom and good taste shall become my prophets and messengers upon the Earth. You will spread my message throughout the land that good and tasty food is still availiable and that such can often be found in the humblest of places. You will gather a forum of disciples from all corners of the land, that will gather together and compare experiences and study and discover where such manna from the heavens can be found. You will write tomes of your discoveries and they will be consumed by the peoples of the Earth, who revile the wickedness of tastlessness and unduly expensive presentations of their daily bread. They will rise up and smite the infidels, as they carry your banner. Go forth and multiply!" Then the Lord disappeared. The newly appointed prophets Jane and Michael looked at one another in astonishment and fervor. "Let's get to it, kiddo!" they both cried and set out upon their long journey. The Lord looked down from his lofty throne and smiled as he saw it was good"
or sumptin like that
(Thank you God for allowing me poetic license and for yourself having a sense of humor. You obviously do, as you allowed i95,Grampy and Clothier as three of the disciples)