85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten

Post
i95
Double Chili Cheeseburger
2011/04/04 13:32:38
Bruce Bilmes and Susan Boyle
Double Chili Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/04 13:43:11
I saw the title and thought - that sounds like The Onion, except for the fact that it's probably true.  Then I open it and it is The Onion!
mar52
Sirloin
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/04 13:47:20
Of course!  I see celery seeds which makes it inedible.
6star
Filet Mignon
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/04 13:48:33
I believe that figure only applies to ONION coleslaw. 
Michael Hoffman
Double-chop Porterhouse
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/04 13:54:45
You mean some fools actually eat 15 percent?
EdSails
Filet Mignon
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/04 14:17:00
Oh, the horror!!!!!
ayersian
Double Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/04 15:12:46
If this were real, it wouldn't surprise me.  Most cole slaw is terrible, especially those that swim in mayo...  Chris
Foodbme
Porterhouse
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/04 16:36:04
Since it's an Official Report by the U.S. Dept of Sides & Garnishes, it must be true!
I laugh now but I would not be surprised if such a department actually existed!
The Travelin Man
Filet Mignon
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/04 17:38:50
For the record, 100% of the cole slaw served to me remains uneaten.
6star
Filet Mignon
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/04 18:43:20
Foodbme

Since it's an Official Report by the U.S. Dept of Sides & Garnishes, it must be true!
I laugh now but I would not be surprised if such a department actually existed!


I had always thought the U.S. Dept. of Sides & Garnishes was responsible for inspecting the halves of butchered animal carcasses and for wage garnishing.  You learn something new every day!
" />
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/06 10:54:27
Make a joke about slaw in an east Carolina Q joint, and you'll be able to hear a pin drop!
pnwchef
Filet Mignon
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/06 11:06:46
I thought it would be more like 86 .257% I didn't realize it was a flat 85%. It just goes to show how much yucky Cole slaw there is out there...
brisketboy
Double Chili Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/06 11:39:35
I wonder how much potato salad remains uneaten.
the ancient mariner
Filet Mignon
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/06 14:16:26
Coleslaw is good for what ails ya.  Ruff-age is important.
I forgot what for, but I know it's important.  And, my Sainted
Mother would say----and I quote---
"It's a sin to throw (good, bad, or indifferent) coleslaw away."
Eat it----- there are kids in Africa starving.
joerogo
Filet Mignon
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/06 19:04:48
Easy solution......ban mayonnaise in all 50 States.
 
Make your slaw with oil and vinegar and watch it disappear
6star
Filet Mignon
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/06 22:52:09
Sorry joe, oil and vinegar slaw is the one kind of slaw I won't touch.
MellowRoast
Double Chili Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/08 06:40:26
All seriousness aside, it's almost impossible to find good slaw in restaurants.  In fact, this thread made me so hungry for it, I used a whole head of cabbage to make a batch.  I'll be in heaven for 3 days, if it lasts that long.
brisketboy
Double Chili Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/08 09:47:31
I disremember which Q joint it was but they served slaw with oil and vinegar and I ate the whole dam thing.
wanderingjew
Sirloin
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/08 09:50:41
Unless the ingredients include chopped raw onion, then I'm all over it!
irisarbor
Double Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/08 12:06:40
my hubby loves any and all slaw,
I like most except for I detest KFC-
love homemade, esp with Marzetti dressing, which I think is the perfect balance, even if it is full of artificila everything... LOL
 
jeepguy
Double Chili Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/10 05:35:42
My fav is from Chick-fil-A.
MellowRoast
Double Chili Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/10 06:24:34
Of all the foods people are really finicky about (including me), slaw has to be at or near the top, and I haven't yet figured out why. 
post edited by MellowRoast - 2011/04/10 07:47:18
mjambro
Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/13 18:07:17
There is no doubt that 100% of the packaged slaw with a six+ month shelf life is horrible..   On the other hand, fresh can be quite excellent.   As for a chain slaw, I've found KFC slaw to be quite excellent.  I'm not sure I've ever had another chain's slaw that was tolerable.
MellowRoast
Double Chili Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/13 18:31:44
Yes, I think KFC is excellent, too, though I wish they'd go lighter on the sugar.  This thread really has gotten to me.  I'm now chowing through my 2nd batch of homemade slaw since the thread started. 
Foodbme
Porterhouse
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/13 19:16:03
Never met a slaw I didn't like. Some I liked better than others. Now Potato Salad-- that's another story. I won't eat Restaurant Potato Salad.
MellowRoast
Double Chili Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/13 19:26:25
I agree it's really tough to find a good restaurant potato salad, and the foodservice tubs are rank.  Although I've had good potato salad in some restaurants, I can count them on one hand. 
speechpeach
Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/13 22:48:15
Most restaurant coleslaw tastes nasty to me, must be some sort of preservative that has an odd taste?  Possibly the fact that many coleslaw dressings taste like Miracle Whip to me, which I detest.  I do not care for cole slaw with onion or pickles or sugar with  a mayo based dressing, which limits my choices.  I do like one with a good oil and vinegar type dressing, and make one myself that is tasty to me.
MellowRoast
Double Chili Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/14 08:02:04
Considering how divided America is on coleslaw, KFC is darn lucky theirs is in such demand!
MiamiDon
Filet Mignon
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/14 09:11:27
I haven't eaten food from a KFC in 20+ years, but I remember the coleslaw being particularly vile!
jackd418
Junior Burger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/14 13:01:35
If I was served the slaw in the photo I would send it back too.Nasty looking mess.
My current favorite slaw consists of,(I don't measure)
Red cabbage
shredded carrotts
some celery
olive oil
splash of wine vinegar(red or white)
just a dab?of Dijon mustard or grainy or both (ok a bunch)
and salt.
post edited by jackd418 - 2011/04/14 13:17:41
jackd418
Junior Burger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/14 13:15:52
Marzetti dressing?as bad it's as bad as store brand salad dressing(miracle whip type garbage).Mean no offense.To each their own
jajarino68
Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/14 14:20:26
I like cole slaw but it must be coarsely chopped, not minced. And it must have celery seed in it. I prefer the mayo based slaw as opposed to a vinegar slaw.
MellowRoast
Double Chili Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/15 01:35:17
irisarbor

my hubby loves any and all slaw,
I like most except for I detest KFC-
love homemade, esp with Marzetti dressing, which I think is the perfect balance, even if it is full of artificila everything... LOL


I don't know if you've seen it, but Marzetti has an all-natural slaw dressing which I bought before I started making my own. 
brisketboy
Double Chili Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2011/04/15 10:01:11
You haven't eaten really vile slaw until you have tried the slaw produced by some semi-literate Navy cook for a steel deck picnic in the south Pacific somewhere between Guam and Singapore. Good luck with that!
badbyron722
Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/07 19:08:55
Very picky when it comes to slaw. To be honest I like my own version the best.
Twinwillow
Sirloin
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/07 19:14:34
I like purple cabbage but, not in my cole slaw.
CCinNJ
Sirloin
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/07 19:16:55
I like Marzetti Dressing.

Here we go!
Michael Hoffman
Double-chop Porterhouse
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/07 19:26:34
I'm a big fan of Marzetti slaw dressing. I like both chopped and shredded slaw. But I can't stand slaw ON a pulled pork sandwich.
the grillman
Double Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/07 21:37:46
for a commercial dressing, Marzetti is the best.  just don't overdo it; I use less than the bottle reccomends, and add some extra cider vinegar.  A good vinegar dressing is my preference when homemade.
 
And I've eaten plenty of so-so slaw in restaurants, but it's my preferred side with eatin' barbecue.  Even more so than beans or potato salad. The cabbage and vinegar seem to cut the richness of the pork; beef; ribs, whatever, allowing me to refresh the palate and enjoy even more barbecue.  Same thing when eating catfish; gotta have slaw.
 
A semi regular side bowl of slaw when traveling, plus some oatmeal or a bran muffin for breakfast, helps keep my vacations moving along!
 
SeamusD
Double Chili Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/08 09:36:37
I like both mayo and vinegar based slaws, but I can't do mayo anymore (egg allergy), so I use vidalia onion salad dressing when I make that type. I avoid it like the plague if I'm eating out.
ann peeples
Sirloin
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/08 12:24:23
For parties, I used to make/and or buy 1and a half ponds of slaw. No one really ate it( have you ever heard anyone say" Oh- I love coleslaw") So I learned.Funny, as Mr. Hoffman said, i tried slaw on n.c.bbq( both eastern and western) and thought it was, meh.However, i did enjoy a slaw dog at Snoopy's in Raleigh......
fishtaco
Double Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/08 14:08:55
brisketboy

You haven't eaten really vile slaw until you have tried the slaw produced by some semi-literate Navy cook for a steel deck picnic in the south Pacific somewhere between Guam and Singapore. Good luck with that!

 
But it would be great to use in a crossing the line ceremony!

brisketboy
Double Chili Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/08 15:01:14
That and the Royal Baby's belly covered in Vege-Mite. Some things you cannot unsee or untaste.
Root-Beer Man
Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/08 19:02:24
Well, when it's good slaw it's in the 15% that gets eaten around here. I love slaw, so does my eldest. Can't stand a bad slaw, tho. Won't take more than a bite or so if it's no good.
MetroplexJim
Filet Mignon
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/08 19:55:02
As is usual with "stories" in The Onion, peel away the humor and there is often a grain of truth.
 
A tasty slaw is always in the palate of the eater.  Anything that falls short of what we favor is sampled in a single fork-full, then left uneaten.
post edited by MetroplexJim - 2013/01/08 19:57:07
MetroplexJim
Filet Mignon
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/08 20:02:12
chewingthefat

Make a joke about slaw in an east Carolina Q joint, and you'll be able to hear a pin drop!


True enough.  As a non-native who 's E.C. 'cue, I always get the "fish-eye" when I tell them to hold the slaw on a sandwich or to put it on the side in a platter.
CCinNJ
Sirloin
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/09 22:19:50
I'm sure that the NYC area accounts for a large percentage of the percentage. We have wonderful cole slaw here.
Russ Jackson
Double Chili Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/10 18:34:07
i95

 
 


 
Off topic: Did you see the cheat to win Lance Armstrong bracelet bands at The Onion?
http://store.theonion.com...t-to-win-bracelet.aspx
 
ann peeples
Sirloin
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/10 20:04:13
I have been reading The Onion since it started years ago......loved the articles then-SO satirical! Written solely by college students.
CCinNJ
Sirloin
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/10 22:57:05
Onions in cole slaw make cole slaw suck...and account in the 85% side of the ledger.

Cole slaw should be cold...and calculating.
post edited by CCinNJ - 2013/01/10 22:59:52
phatphil
Double Cheeseburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/13 17:11:07
i only eat slaw at kfc and carsons ribs in chicago and most good southern bbqs
kland01s
Filet Mignon
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/13 17:24:00
Yesterday friends we haven't seen in ages wanted to meet so we went to TGIFriday's. I do like their food. Yesterday I had a flat iron steak which was cooked to order and tender and had a side of their ginger lime slaw. It was great! Sharing with my friends, we detected cilantro, chili flakes, lime and ginger over a thin sliced cabbage slaw. We are going to try to replicate it. I love ginger!
rneiner
Hamburger
Re:85% of U.S. Coleslaw Remains Uneaten 2013/01/13 17:42:48
I love marzettis and on pulled pork.